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USOPC and the New USATT

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mjamja View Drop Down
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    Posted: 12/04/2019 at 1:43pm
Through diligent (but not always legal) efforts I was able to uncover the plans of the USOPC for the new and improved USATT.

Improved Support for Clubs
All current member clubs will be asked to reapply for membership.  In order to provide better service the current number of member clubs will be reduced by limiting club membership to those clubs having full time coaches and certified junior and elite athlete training programs.  The High Performance Committe will be responsible for the certification process.

USOCP has trademarked the term Table Tennis Club (and some variants).  Member clubs will receive the right to use the term.  Any non-member club using the term will be sued. USOPC/USATT will graciously allow non-member clubs to designate themselves as Ping Pong Clubs.

To help clubs gain and keep membership, entry into any USATT sanctioned event will be limited to members of a USATT member club.  All entry forms will carry the information "Ping Pong players need not apply".

The USOPC and the new improved USATT is currently working on a plan where major brands of table tennis equipment will ONLY be available through member club shops.  In order to "Make American Table Tennis Great Again"  political supporters have agreed to impose large tariffs on companies not agreeing to the USOPC's plan.

New Rating Plan
All adults with a current rating below 2000 will simply receive a INW (I'm Not Worthy) designation and will no longer have their rating updated.  INW players who believe they have improved over the threshold may submit results for re-rating twice a year for a $50 fee.  Junior players will have a sliding age/rating cutoff scale for determining Rated vs INW status.  This should help with the underrated junior player issue.

As part of this new rating plan, all rating events will be eliminated at USATT tournaments.  Allowed events are Rated Player Open, Rated Player Age, INW Open, and INW Age.  No prize money will be allowed in INW events in order to prevent sandbagging.

Note 1: INW designated players who pay an additional "IDBH"* fee can enter a rated player event. Fee will be on a sliding scale based number of players above 2200 in the event.  This is also the way INW players can establish results that can be submitted to move them into the Rated Player category.

*IDBH - I Don't Belong Here

Note 2: Hardbat and sandpaper events may be allowed in the parking lot at the tournament organizer's descrestion.

Nationals, Open, and Trials Changes
The current system of US Nations, US Open, and Olympic and/or national team trials will be replaced with a series of tournaments where points may be accumulated for use in determining national team membership, selection for upcoming international events,  and Olympic team membership.  These will be 3 day events held approximately each quarter (end Mar, early July, labor day, and end December.  The US Open in December will be eliminated and replaced with a national points trial event the week after Christmas.  The event in July will remain designated as the national championship.  These events will only be open to players eligible for the national team (or Olympic team in year preceding Olympics).  Event organizers will have the option off adding INW events and age events if time and venue space is available but the points trial portion has priority.

I am sure there are other plans I have not yet uncovered.

Mark - Founding member of the INW Players Association.  

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tom View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote tom Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/04/2019 at 1:54pm
you had me going for a couple of paragraphs
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ttunderthesun21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/04/2019 at 2:02pm
Originally posted by tom tom wrote:

you had me going for a couple of paragraphs


You and me both.  XD
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DonnOlsen Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/04/2019 at 2:16pm
Hi,

I am beyond pleased by your findings.  

Of highest pleasure comes from the finally formulated strict structure of class among the players.  None other than the prodigious Karl Marx rightfully identified class as the correct organizing mental construct in understanding social, political, and economic activities within a nation.  With this brilliant codification finding that has previously only existed as an undocumented cultural fact within our sport, we now will no longer be required to engage in the exceedingly tiresome process of "What is your rating?," followed often by awkward maneuvers if the response reveals the unworthiness of us real players' attention and participation. 

The INWs, we can all agree, have been a source of unrestricted annoyance among real players since forever.  With this new, formal declaration, everything will run more smoothly, in particular a significant reduction in intermingling due to the statutory segregation that real players have dreamed about for ages.  If I may suggest, the imposition of a mandatory INW badge on the clothing of all those so designated will permit, at a glance, the person's rightful place and strongly support the enforcement of rights and privileges per class standing.

I could not be happier.

Thanks.
"God is not on the side of the heavy battalions, but of the best shots." Voltaire
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mjamja Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/04/2019 at 4:21pm
Found another USOPC plan.

Social Media Promotion Of Table Tennis
In order to present the best image of Table Tennis in social media a new filming/recording rule will be enacted.
1. There will be no filiming/recording  allowed of any INW matches.
2. Even in Rated Player matches filming/ recording of old, fat, unathletic players will be banned.
3. No matter what the players rating, no filming will be allowed of any pushblocker.
4. Publishing any of the above type videos will result in a years suspension of membership for first offense and permanent loss of membership for repeated offenses.

McEnroe Moments Mandate
In order to maximize the chance of a TT video going viral some new conduct rules will be enacted.
Each player in a quarterfinal and above match will be required to initiate a McEnroe moment into the match.  Of course yelling at Umpire ( especially "You got to be kidding" will qualify.  Kicking a barrier and throwing a racket will also qualify.  A long demonstrative rant to the umpire about your opponent serving illegally will also qualify.  Any yellow cards given during your required MM (McEnroe Moment) will not count toward a red card, point loss, or DQ.  In the event that one player is not comfortable with such actions, the other player can agree to conduct two MM's during the match as long as umpire is notified prior to matches beginnings.  A special action such as a hand switch, behind back shot, spectacular dive for ball, or jump over barriers can be substituted for an MM.  Just make sure umpire acknowledges your action as a substitute MM.  Failure to perform your MM before one player reaches 10 pts in what could be a deciding game will result in a red card.

Mark - Who does not need to practice his McEnroe moments since he is old, unathletic and will a always be an INW player.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote benfb Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/04/2019 at 4:32pm
Brilliant post Mark; maybe your best ever.  You also had me going for the first bit as well.

Actually, I didn't even realize it was you posting at first.  I say this big, bold font, and that's the sort of font that Donn favors, so I just assumed it was him.  Then, as I read along, I realized it sounded like your kind of humor, so I checked, and, sure enough, I was being pranked by Santa-Mark.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote lineup32 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/04/2019 at 8:14pm
Originally posted by mjamja mjamja wrote:

<span style="font-size: 19px;">Through diligent (but not always legal) efforts I was able to uncover the plans of the USOPC for the new and improved USATT.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">Improved Support for Clubs</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">All current member clubs will be asked to reapply for membership.  In order to provide better service the current number of member clubs will be reduced by limiting club membership to those clubs having full time coaches and certified junior and elite athlete training programs.  The High Performance Committe will be responsible for the certification process.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">USOCP has trademarked the term Table Tennis Club (and some variants).  Member clubs will receive the right to use the term.  Any non-member club using the term will be sued. USOPC/USATT will graciously allow non-member clubs to designate themselves as Ping Pong Clubs.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">To help clubs gain and keep membership, entry into any USATT sanctioned event will be limited to members of a USATT member club.  All entry forms will carry the information "Ping Pong players need not apply".</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">The USOPC and the new improved USATT is currently working on a plan where major brands of table tennis equipment will ONLY be available through member club shops.  In order to "Make American Table Tennis Great Again"  political supporters have agreed to impose large tariffs on companies not agreeing to the USOPC's plan.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">New Rating Plan</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">All adults with a current rating below 2000 will simply receive a INW (I'm Not Worthy) designation and will no longer have their rating updated.  INW players who believe they have improved over the threshold may submit results for re-rating twice a year for a $50 fee.  Junior players will have a sliding age/rating cutoff scale for determining Rated vs INW status.  This should help with the underrated junior player issue.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">As part of this new rating plan, all rating events will be eliminated at USATT tournaments.  Allowed events are Rated Player Open, Rated Player Age, INW Open, and INW Age.  No prize money will be allowed in INW events in order to prevent sandbagging.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">Note 1: INW designated players who pay an additional "IDBH"* fee can enter a rated player event. Fee will be on a sliding scale based number of players above 2200 in the event.  This is also the way INW players can establish results that can be submitted to move them into the Rated Player category.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">*IDBH - I Don't Belong Here</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">Note 2: Hardbat and sandpaper events may be allowed in the parking lot at the tournament organizer's descrestion.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">Nationals, Open, and Trials Changes</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">The current system of US Nations, US Open, and Olympic and/or national team trials will be replaced with a series of tournaments where points may be accumulated for use in determining national team membership, selection for upcoming international events,  and Olympic team membership.  These will be 3 day events held approximately each quarter (end Mar, early July, labor day, and end December.  The US Open in December will be eliminated and replaced with a national points trial event the week after Christmas.  The event in July will remain designated as the national championship.  These events will only be open to players eligible for the national team (or Olympic team in year preceding Olympics).  Event organizers will have the option off adding INW events and age events if time and venue space is available but the points trial portion has priority.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">I am sure there are other plans I have not yet uncovered.</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">
</span>
<span style="font-size: 19px;">Mark - Founding member of the INW Players Association.  </span>



I assume you will be the first High Performance Director, My congratulation !
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DonnOlsen Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/05/2019 at 12:33pm
I assume you will be the first High Performance Director, My congratulation !

Let us be careful here and let us be clear here: On the matter of this fella assuming a senior position in the organization, it must be emphasized that the extent of his domain of influence is highly circumscribed, including but never going beyond the realm of the INW.  As the person he is, on many occasions demonstrating his integrity, his awareness of his table tennis station in life, and the acceptance of his appropriate place in a discipline of clearly superior planes, never would it be contemplated of any interaction with real players.

Secondly, on the statement including High Performance Director I'm confident in stating you must have meant Low Performance Director.

Thanks.


Edited by DonnOlsen - 12/05/2019 at 12:33pm
"God is not on the side of the heavy battalions, but of the best shots." Voltaire
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote benfb Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/05/2019 at 1:01pm
I want to see Mark as high performance director.  His first rule would be that all the men learn to "play like girls".
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mjamja Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/05/2019 at 2:45pm
Originally posted by benfb benfb wrote:

I want to see Mark as high performance director.  His first rule would be that all the men learn to "play like girls".

Well it seems to be working for Harimoto!

Mark - Am I even worthy of being not worthy.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DonnOlsen Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12/06/2019 at 6:42am
Hi,

As early as childhood we learn the requirements for rules, regulations, and statutes, as our early lives are typically dominated by these often idiotic declarations, must be of sufficient precision.  We have in this rule suggestion His first rule would be that all the men learn to "play like girls". inadequate qualification.

First, never should a USATT statute not include the class distinction.  The above first rule would specifically be limited to the INWs.  As previously stated, this fella's extent of influence is exclusive to the INW class of the sport's participants.  His official capacity is completely irrelevant to real players.

Second, we all are aware that a significant percentage of the INWs play like girls today.  Just watch them play!  The INWs need no encouragement here, as this participant class has, similar to a Marxian premise of Capitalism, inherent contradictions that will lead to its dissolution.  The elevated real player class knows this about the INWs, yet it completely escapes the conscious awareness of the INWs (as, obviously, most things in the sport do in this class.)

Thirdly, any references to gender are completely inappropriate in the statutes, as we leaders, in directing the behavior of those most in need of direction, must avoid any prejudice, any bias, and any stipulation of declared inferiority other than the key distinction as noted by this fella.  We hold ourselves to the highest of moral standing in our vitally important and generous contribution to the sport.  

The strategic theme guiding the regulations should feature, above and beyond all others, segregation, for, by a very wide margin, the source of class irritation in both the upper and the lower classes is realized in the intermingling of the two quite distinct peoples.  Improvements in the sport will be realized in direct proportion to the degree in which participants stay with their own kind.  This cannot be disputed.  As we move forward, let's stay focused here.

Thanks.


Edited by DonnOlsen - 12/06/2019 at 6:58am
"God is not on the side of the heavy battalions, but of the best shots." Voltaire
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